Rape Aggression Defense Training
A week of January Term
by Mara Brownsmith

The first week of January Term, before I even started writing my Division III papers, before Grad school deadlines, and before most people had returned to snowy Amherst, four other women and I learned how to kick-ass. We enrolled, pre-registered on the hub, showed up at 100pm and put up with all sorts of other hassles to feel safe, to feel powerful, and to try not to think about times when we might actually need to use rape aggression defense skills.

We were all Division III women. (One had already graduated in December.) We had three instructors, Karen Pauley of the community Health collaborative, Marion the martial arts instructor at the RCC, and Troy Hill the basketball coach. As we filled out paper work about our medical history I felt as if we were about to be let in on a secret, a secret that was already contained within each of us, a secret potential for violence about to erupt out of each of these smiling beautiful young women.

Each of us had similar reasons for wanting to take the week long RAD course. Mine were plain. I honestly did not know how to punch somebody. I grew up as an only child, never even playfully combating with siblings. What was the best way to debilitate a would-be attacker? I realize there are women out there who do know how to punch, kick, and scream, but this is not my character. I shy away from violence and any intimidating circumstance or confrontation. I have an idea from movies, TV, and culture in general that one should kick an assailant in the balls, run away and go buy a gun. I had seen J-Lo in Enough . I had had the scare tactic assemblies in middle school that made me believe around every dark corner there was a big scary man waiting to get me. I had the basic fear, the basic strength, and the basic need to do something about it. So there I was.

The first day we learned about stances that conveyed the animalistic big-and-scary-stay-away-from-this look. We also learned something that was the easiest and hardest part of the course. It was a skill that would have to be reinforced everyday, a skill that we received the most encouragement to do, and the most praise if we did well.

We learned how to yell.

Not girly high-pitched misinterpret-able screams, but yells. Any person eating lunch at the Bridge Cafe that week may have heard the "NO" and "STAY BACK" in a steady rhythm as we attached these words to every maneuver we learned. The first skill we learned was how to block a punch. This was easy until our instructors put on pads and began swinging at our heads. Then the lackadaisical blocking and parrying became the powerful "NO" as we swung our forearms against the impending blows.

When I told my male friends that I was in women's self defense they asked if we got to beat the crap out of a guy in a padded suit. They followed my "yes" with an inquiry into whether they could be the guys in the padded suit! The attack simulation is the most intimidating and interesting part of the course. It puts one's skills to the test in a "realistic" situation, or at least more realistic then kicking a pad your best friend is holding.

As the days progressed we learned how to block, escape from, and counter numerous attacks. I felt like a martial artist going through a routine as our instructors called out a string of verbs that would have been meaningless to me two days before "sweep kick-block-parry-hammer fist-straight kick-forward strike-forward strike-forward strike-knee to the groin."

I now knew how to punch. It was not that hard. It was satisfying to feel my fist slam into the pad and watch my partner's arm move backwards from the force of the impact. We had also learned how to escape from several holds (wrist, shoulder, neck, choke hold from behind, bear hug) and even how to get someone off of you when you are lying on the ground. I was inspired to see my classmates throw each other around the room, to use their voices in a powerful way, and to see how their skills and confidence had improved in such a short time. This is the main benefit of RAD: to teach women that they can fight back, that they do have strength, that they are not powerless. All of us chose to participate in the attack simulation the last day of the course.

We got gear: kneepads, elbow pads, helmets, and gloves. This was nothing, however, compared to the full body suits that Troy and Marion put on when they transformed from nice guy RAD instructors, into evil attackers. Each of us went through four situations. The goal of each situation was to escape from the taped off section of the room out the door. I went last. I needed to see how everyone else did. When it was my turn I got lead in, and the whole situation was a blur of emotions, instincts, and shouting. The adrenaline came from not knowing when the attack would begin, but the feeling of hitting my padded fist against a padded person's padded solarplexis was surprisingly less powerful than hitting my naked fist against a pad. Four trials were strangely short and exhausting. Afterwards, I felt shaken. Even though I had been in no physical danger I still felt the need to withdraw, to regroup in private from the intensity of the experience. We all sat around, disrobed from our padded gear, stretched, and discussed our feelings about what had just happened.

I had not thought of the course in some time until the snow was falling in snowballs on Friday night two weeks ago. I was wrestling in the snow, having a snowball fight, and riding bikes recklessly through Prescott . Even though the wrestling was friendly I still felt like I knew how to block grabs and spin out of any grab that did catch me. It was nice to feel protected even in a playful snow wrestle. I sincerely hope that this is the extent to which I will ever have to use my RAD training, but knowing that I can level a punch at someone allows me to live my life with more confidence and less fear. I have learned the secret.

Mara Brownsmith graduated from Hampshire College in Spring 2003.  Mara concentrated in biblical studies and geology, and was very active in Ultimate Frisbee while she was here. Her Division III capstone project is Modern Christian Reactions to the Historical Jesus Controversy. She wants to teach for a year and then enter graduate school in theology.